random thoughts

bestie told me that "we are promised of an another half, but happiness was never part of that deal...." or something like that. life should have been fair to you since you have been fair to life or telling a lion that he shouldnt eat you because you dont eat lion. thats life, it never made any sense no matter how hard you try. u got caught up with loads of shits when you least expected, you get tangled up in complicated matter, no matter how carefully u have been, you will always be in all sortof situation at all sortof time. tho this are the setbacks in life, this are also the real thing that makes you feel alive. its like waking up in the morning knowing how exactly life is going to treat you is sure no fun at all. i like waking up in the morning, getting all sortof suprises, meeting new and old people and those kinda things. to a point your life might get pretty routine but one day when you have a certain someone that sets your purpose in life... that is all the reason you need to breath for another day... to run tru the storm... to survive yet another horror... to wake up in the morning. but then again some people use work as their definition in life. working like a mad dog to earn big fat cheque, drive fast cars and roll with the ballers. to me, yes money is close to everything... it sets how your life and how your childrens life is going to be but remember after working hard at work for the rest of your life and you are old and weak, nobody will remember what you did at work...

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twenty-fucking-one kilometer

so finally ive broken my vir-21KM-ginity, it was super freaking bloody effing epic tiring.

my timing

 official timing

good thing was i was the 1272th person to finish the half marathon out of 1759 people, meaning i was at the finishing line along with other racers, not early (how i wish) and not one of the least but the bad thing was, i was too goddamn arrogant to put on some vaseline (thought ive survived many 10-13KM marathon without any) on where it is blisters-prone-area, got blisters at the most un-sexy-est places evergh! my tities, armpits and me toe. sadly there wasnt any cam whoring session, so no pictures with me medals in me finisher tee. technically if a person were to do a half marathon in the future, he/she must be physically and mentally... yes! i repeat MENTALLY are ready to do nothing but walk+running for almost 3 hours. tho the people around you wont be any help (at the 18KM marker, there was runners bergelimpangan di jalanraya with their ice packs *owh shame on you event organiser, for not providing any cool sprays at every KM markers* and puking at the nearest longkang they can find). lemme give you my breakdown of my every kilometers.

01KM - ok! here we go!


03KM - still able to maintain my pace


06KM - a bit tired but still surviving

09KM - *taking out my instant energy chocolate* om noms noms noms

12KM - less running, more walking

15KM - dripping with pains, having that almost cramps pain, starting to regret joining this half marathon. what was i thinking? its already 2 hours... this is too much... but already passed the point of no return... oowh fuck this shit! fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuckkk!

18KM - every step is a torture, couldnt feel much of my legs... too tired... gotta keep goin... even if i have to crawl... dah dekat sangat... oh fuck... shit... dammit... fuck fuck fuckitty fuck...

21KM - HEAVEN!

not trying to be funny but this what was goin on in my mind during the race. most of the time i was cursing myself for joining this race. but the moment i step on the 21th KM marker... i was like aaaaammmmaaaaiiigggaaddddd at last...!!! LOL... my next half marathon should NOT be anytime soon i guess... need more training... probably ill try to RUN TO YOU... and see weather i cud? :P

愛、祈る、食べる

私はあなたを愛したいが、私は今私たちが持っているものを危険にさらすのが怖い