... dang!

back then when i first started my current job, most of my friends are either doing their degree or just started working, and as expected most of em are a bit jealous with my paycheck and the lifestyle(not knowing the reality of course). but 3 years down the road, i am still where they last saw me. still same old routine, same job, same position, nothing change, changed or changing. but on the other hand, my friends who are doing their degree are half way down the road and already in UK doing their "plus 2", and most probably gonna start their career over there. and of course my paycheck and my job would be nothing anymore, and the other half who started worked in diff industry has climb up into the management level and of course thing are getting A-OK for them, no more dirty work, no more hard labor, its all about the paperwork and the nagging. no this is not a competition of course, just that after 3 years down the road, everybody is changing, moving up, sorta like level-ing up, acquiring new skills, subordinates and such. and by looking at how things are, dont think im gonna gain any new level any time soon. funny thing about life is "when you think you got thing figured out, you actually have noooooooooo freaking idea about it". thats how i put it, yeah the moment i thought "ouh im here, im safe, think this is it, im good here" that is when life come crashing down on you, life come with that super big ass broadsword and swing over your achievement and send you back where you first started.

space-meng

"Frozen as snow I show no emotion whatsoever so
Don't ask me why I have no love for these motherfucking hoes
Bloodsucking succubuses, what the fuck is up with this?
I've tried in this department but I ain't had no luck with this
It sucks but it's exactly what I thought it would be
Like trying to start over
I got a hole in my heart, for some kind of emotional rollercoaster
Something I won't go on 'til you toy with my emotion, so it's over
It's like an explosion every time I hold you, I wasn't joking when I told you
You take my breath away
You're a supernova... and I'm a..."

born to die

derp and derprina

you know, how in every love movie there will be a part where the narrator would go

"when that moment you saw someone you like, dont bother standing around like an idiot, you should seize the moment, you should just tell her upfront that you like her and would like to date her..."

in other word, better make your move dude before you are being friendzoned. TROLLOL!

so there you are, inspired by these few words, sitting right infront of the TV (coz you are too "forever alone" to go out and watch love movies at the cinema), thinking tomorrow when you see her you'll tell her how you really feel, yeah you went to bed with a dream, a dream of holding her in your arms, a dream of having her till the end of time, with a dream... and only a dream, and the moment you wake up, that dream is only like a yesterdays hangover, you remember u had one, but u dont remember why u had it in the first place, so there you are still trying to figure out how to spill your guts out, eventho you dont see it, that everyday you see her, is a chance given to you, every moment that you have spent has just went down the drain, but still you sat there with that pain stabbing your heart, words suffocating you, couldnt get it out, you just couldnt...

lemme tell you a story, about a dude name Derp and his crush Derprina. Derp met Derprina few years back, tru his friends. at that time Derp had just being dump by his bi ex-girlfriend who prefer pussy than his kinderbueno. eventho he felt all that love at first sight nonsense, but he didnt make any moves as he thought things might look like he was looking for a rebound plus at that time he felt Derprina was out of his league, so they became friends. as their friendship grew, so does Derp's feeling, so he started to stalk her tru her blog (since back then there social network wasnt that hype just yet, ass we had back then was only friendster and myspace), commenting on every single post, using all weird ass pseudonyms, Derp tried to become closer with Derprina, but sadly Derp's friend who introduced them together had a bit of misunderstanding, so since Derp was quite close with her(his friend) at that time, so he had to choose between Derpina or his friend and he made a rather stupid decision, Derp choose his friend. so from that moment they didnt hangout anymore and slowly he sorta lost interest in Derprina since he was concentrating on work and stuff. so few year has passed, and recently they met on twitter, they went out and stuff, thinking wouldnt hurt to go out with an old fling, and suddenly all those old feeling came rushing out of Derp's heart, but this time both of them just came out from a bad relationship, so its that "maybe rebound" moment yet again. and right now Derp is too afraid to do anything....